Gritz Movie Reviews: The Eye, Rambo, Untraceable and More
Posted: Feb 03, 2008THE EYE
Jessica Alba stars as a girl who was accidentally blinded by her sister (Parker Posey) as a child. In her early twenties, she is given a chance at sight with a cornea transplant. There’s only one small problem. The new eyes have memories stored in them from their previous owner, and pretty soon young Jessica is seeing some very disturbing sights that make her wonder if she wasn’t better off in the dark.
It’s a pretty descent movie with some honest to God spooky moments here and there, but by no means a “must see.” No pun intended. Still, it manages to satisfy the lust for horror that all you Stephen King fans are always searching for. Oh, and then there’s Jessica, who is cute enough to make anyone thankful they can see.
Three Stars
BABE WATCH: Jessica Alba gives a whole new meaning to the words "hot babe" in The Eye.
John Rambo fights his biggest fight ever, in a conflict that would make Rocky envious. (Uh- what?) The scenes of genocide are almost too real to watch, with shootings, land mines and sword play that is not for the faint of heart.
An exciting thriller of a movie with an ending that spells sequel. I can see it now. Rambo, back home in the States, fighting terrorists on the homeland. I want a cut if you use that idea, Sly.
FOUR AND ONE HALF STARS
MAD MONEY
I didn’t expect to enjoy this one, with Queen Latifa, Katie Holmes and Diane Keaton teaming up to rob the federal reserve bank, but I swear, Diane Keaton can make the lamest movie a little better. She is a stellar actress.
Of course, her co-stars aren’t half bad either, and what you end up with is a light, sometimes funny, easy to watch film. The kind I like to turn on the TV on a lazy Sunday afternoon. The kind where no real thinking is required. Fun and simple.
TWO AND ONE HALF STARS
UNTRACEABLE
Diane Lane works in law enforcement in the cyber crimes division, tracking down perverts, predators and identity thieves. But now someone has posted a website called KILLWITHME.COM. The site is mirrored all over the world and cannot be traced or shut down, and the person on the other end is killing people live streaming on the internet. The way it all works is, the more hits the site gets, the quicker the victim dies.
Some of the set ups are very reminiscent of something Jigsaw (Saw) would rig up, only in these traps there is really no way to escape, which makes it just a little sicker. If that is possible.
After seeing the Saw movies, this one tends to come off as a little weak, and even Diane Lane’s considerable acting skills can’t raise it above a three.
THREE STARS
THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Daniel Day-Lewis stars as Daniel Plainview, a gold and silver miner who accidentally strikes black gold in turn of the century California during the oil boom. When he begins to acquire more wells and more wealth, the single father (who’s son is used by him to strike deals) is lured on a tip to a small California town that is bubbling with oil. The small town centers around their church and its somewhat bi-polar leader Eli Sunday (Paul Dano of “Little Miss Sunshine”) who is dead set on “saving” Daniel.
Excellent cinematography and period costumes and stellar acting, but I left the theater feeling cheated after 2 hours and 40 minutes. The ending simply left me cold. I may never bowl again.
Three Stars
THE WATER HORSE
When Angus, a young Scottish boy, finds a magic egg, he takes it home and soon finds himself father to the mythical "water horse" of Scottish lore.
Angus begins a journey of discovery, facing his greatest fears and risking his life to protect a secret that would give birth to the legendary Loch Nes monster.
Not since “E.T.” has there been a better “kid befriends creature” film. A heart warming family film I recommend highly.
Five Stars
Movie reviews by Michael Buffalo Smith
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tuckerhead says...
Rambo was awesome Buffalo. I went after reading your review. Yes, there are some of us who value your opinion that much! Thanks!
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